Why I haven’t posted in a while: procrastination or fear?

A few months ago I had the great idea to begin Denay Drops Jewels. I’ve always been a writer. It’s always been my passion, but for many years I didn’t write. As a child, I wrote nearly every day. Poems, songs, short stories, plays…you name it, I wrote it. As I got older my interest faded and went on to other things. In college, I decided to enter Kent State University because you guessed it…..I wanted to be a writer. But then I had a thought. I didn’t need a degree to be a writer. That someday I would write a book or story or play and I would pursue a degree in something else I was passionate about…teaching.

So without going into a full fledged history of Denay, I fast forward to my current dilemma. I decided to start this blog because I wanted to get back to what I was passionate about…writing. I still love teaching, but I always felt a way about not truly pursuing my love for writing. I let it fall to the wayside as I focused on growing as a teacher, citing that teaching was what I truly loved. But here’s the kicker. I’m learning I’ve been called to do both. Lately, I have been struggling with how to balance both of my passions and so therefore this post is written as accountability for me, and hopefully inspiration for you.

When I decided to choose blogging as my way back into authorship, I was so excited! I figured it would be easy since well, writing is what I do. But even though I’ve blogged before…it’s changed a lot. There’s so many new elements to blogging that didn’t exist, particularly if your intentions are to turn your blog into a business. The wealth of information out there can be downright overwhelming and I’m here to tell you I let it get the best of me.

I haven’t posted in a while because the perfectionist, procrastinator and over-thinker in me took over. This blog is my baby. It’s me getting back to my other passion. I found myself going back and forth between focusing on my teaching career, and incorporating my new blog into an already hectic schedule. No excuses will be made here….only the truth. It was fear. I saw a post recently that I shared on my instagram story that struck a nerve. I am re-sharing here.

Considering this quote and some of the struggles I’ve had in building my blog no other term quite fits the hold up. Fear. Fear of failure. Fear of not being good enough. This realization made me think more about which aspects of building Denay Drops Jewels brought on fear and it’s simple…the parts that I’m not an expert in. Full transparency here….all the blogger things that have nothing to do with actual blogging were just throwing ya girl for a loop. But then I remembered my purpose for writing again. Written expression is one of my strongest traits. With this post I’m forgiving myself for being afraid. If I can help one woman understand that fear shouldn’t hold you back from pursuing your calling or something you’re passionate about…I’ve dropped the most valuable jewel.

In taking my own advice, I won’t allow fear to cripple me any longer. My message will reach those for who it is meant. Which brings to mind another quote I absolutely love.

And so I’m restarting. Going for it and growing my blog as I grow. Incorporating my other passion of teaching and learning into becoming the blogger I envisioned from the start. Bye fear…you have no place here. Another jewel dropped. šŸ’Ž

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4 Comments

  1. Kimberly
    05/23/2019 / 3:42 pm

    I love this post!! I can def relate!

  2. 05/23/2019 / 6:08 pm

    I hear you, I feel the same way about writing and branching out on my own. Plus, there’s something so personal about writing and being seen by others through writing. It’s like sharing a sacred piece of yourself with the world and once its out— its out!
    Looking forward to seeing you blossom as you reconnect with your love for writing.

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